BREAKING: Your friend who complained about Trump on Facebook for the last two years didn’t vote.

New York (Capitol Hill Underground) — Despite impressive, record breaking early voting numbers, there are still those who continue to shirk their Democratic duty come voting day.

Our story today centers around Jerry (last name withheld), 32 year-old white male, who only left his hometown once for the Knibb High Senior trip to Cabo where, according to him, he “pounded so many margs he was pissing blue agave for weeks.”

But even if you don’t know Knibb High graduate, Jerry, I think we can agree that we all have a “Jerry” in our life. It’s hard not to be impressed by his liberal leanings, open-mindedness and ability to post multiple, seemingly contradictory posts on Facebook on any given day.

Jerry really kicked his social network footprint (SNF) into high gear this midterm election season sharing any and every anti-Trump article he could get his hands whether the stories were verified and accurate or not.

Shockingly, or actually not surprising, Jerry did not make it to the polls on election day because according to his last post, “the whole system is rigged.” Although I’m sure he does believe that, I am of the personal opinion that he didn’t make it to the polls because his mom needed the mini van for her bi-weekly Costco run.

Whether it was laziness, hypocrisy or lack of transportation that kept Jerry from the polls, I believe we can all agree that it is unacceptable. We are fortunate enough to live in a country where we are allowed and encouraged to actively participate in this process — we must not become complacent.

As long as we all sit idly by and let the “Jerrys” in our lives booger up our democracy, the future of this nation is in peril. Hold your friends accountable, hold your enemies hand and get out there and vote.

(Editor’s note: apologies to anyone whose name is Jerry, this article is not directed at you… unless, of course, you didn’t vote.)

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